Bible Verses: Proverbs 14:17,29; 15:1,18; 19:11,19; 20:3,22; 22:24-25,29; 25:15,28; 29:11,22; Ephesians 4:26,31-32; Ecclesiastes 7:9; Mark 3:5; Psalm 7:11; James 1:19-20; Genesis 4:3-11 (Why was Cain angry? Was it God’s or Abel’s fault that he was angry?)

Core Verse: Proverbs 29:11 – “A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.”

Understanding Anger:

Who wants to be around angry people? Proverbs 22:24-25 says to not make friends with a hot-tempered man. “Well Jesus was angry when He turned over the tables in the temple”, you might say. Yes, that is true. Jesus was angry. The difference was that Jesus was angry at sin. That is a righteous anger. Psalm 4:4 also says, “In your anger do not sin…” This shows that we are allowed to get angry, but we are not to sin in our anger.

What do you get angry at? Siblings who bother you? Parents who tell you what to do? Do you get angry when things don’t go your way? This type of anger is sin. Anger usually comes because we expect to be treated a certain way and it doesn’t happen. Anger also comes when we feel we have the right to something and we don’t get it. Anger stems from selfishness. We may laugh at little kids when they throw a temper tantrum when they get a toy taken away from them when they are surrounded by tons of other toys. This same thing happens as teenagers. Your parents might ask you to take out the trash when you are playing video games. This inconveniences you, so you get angry at your parents. You may have felt that you had the right to play video games, so how dare your mom take that right away from you.

The culture around us tell us that, if someone makes us mad, we need to be honest with them and let it all out. People generally think that venting is a good thing, because it gets rid of the anger and you’ll feel better afterwards. The reason people feel better after they vent is NOT because they got rid of the anger, it’s because they were allowing themselves to give in to their sinful desires. Venting says that getting angry and letting it out on others is okay. This is very selfish. God’s Word says that only fools vent. The truly wise man will stay under control and look for a solution to the problem that made them angry. The wise man will be understanding and look for ways to reconcile.

Other Resources on Anger: “Getting a Grip” by Lou Priolo, “The Heart of Anger” by Lou Priolo